10: Anywhere but the Present

I’m having one of those weeks where the time under my feet keeps rolling up and getting caught in the door.

It’s awards season in the beer world, so I thought I’d give myself something to celebrate — a look back on my achievements. Word to the wise: don’t do this if you’re in a depressive slump. This newsletter isn’t about depression, don’t worry. There’s nothing duller than reading about mental health without context or emotional weight. Depression is boring, and totally flat, and it pretends to have depth by trawling the past for the oil-spill iridescence that coats old wounds, giving them an exotic sheen in the dark, making them easier to find among the cold, damp furriness of forgotten times.

Hey, maybe this is about depression.

Anyway, I’ve done my week of morbidity. I know the next move is to make plans for the immediate future, no matter how much I’d rather do literally anything else, so that’s what I’m doing. Autumn is coming. It’s breath is already felt around here, if you look at the fattening blackberries and the colour of the leaves, and the scudding black clouds and the brownly-brackening moors. I’m not swooping straight into winter this year. I’m planning an autumn, packed with things that celebrate the darker seasons rather than dread them, and I hope you’ll join me in doing so too. Make SAD your obedient whippet this year.

Other stuff:


My stuff:

お好み焼き屋 (Okonomiyaki) – Masashi Shimakawa

7: Desire and Disgust


I love food. I would give anything to be the type of person who, when presented with a tray of chargrilled fish eyes thinks, “ooh, great, thanks.” But I’m not.

I’m becoming fascinated with the idea of disgust — how it’s a visceral feeling within you. You don’t just have a distaste. Your body physically recoils, tears fill your eyes, your skin prickles, your throat closes up. That’s true disgust. It’s an amazing reaction. It used to save our lives.

I usually crave salty, fermented, aged, almost-but-not-quite rotten flavours. I love cheeses, cured meats, breads, beers, wines and ciders. I love spice and heat and bitterness. I told myself for so long that I was fussy; a picky eater. As I build up the tasting thesaurus inside my brain, I realise I was just putting cold hard facts before flavour. I was scared of reality, and the grimness of cooked things, rather than my desire for their tastes, and the journeys they would take me on.

So I ate a softshell crab this week. I liked it, but wanted more salt and a lot more heat. I’d tasted it, rather than thought about its body, soft and helpless in its molted state. It doesn’t sound like it, but that’s progress.

Other stuff:

I’ve just realised that pretty much all of the above are from American publications. I blame my sudden obsession with east coast immigrant-American cooking and food culture thanks to the film Always Be My Maybe and a fifth rewatch of Ugly Delicious.

My stuff:

  • If you didn’t see it already, I wrote about one of my favourite subjects for Ferment mag — how do you know the historically-brewed beer you’re drinking actually tastes like it would have done back then?

  • I’m working on a few articles at the moment, but nothing’s been posted up in a while. Check back next week for more updates, I guess.

  • I went to a photography class last week run by Matt Curtis (shoutout) and I really enjoyed learning about how looking at photos that inspire us can help us become better photographers. I love the idea that beauty can install itself in you, ready for you to use it at a later date.

ORIGINAL ILLUSTRATION © DANIEL GRAY-BARNETT
I looked through The Crane Wife for a perfect illustration, and it turns out,
this is the only one. I imagined the rest. That’s how good it is.

3: The Past and The Present


This week one article in particular got me thinking about what it is we love about pubs.

I know, how original.

But listen, right. Jessica Furseth is an excellent writer who focuses on culture and urbanism, and above all, her beloved changing city of London. 

In her piece for Huck called, dramatically, “The Curse of the British Pub Refurbishment“, she heavily laments the encroaching circular saw of ‘progress’ as it reaches her favourite pub, The Coach on Greek Street in Soho. Like most pub pieces it’s full of heart and deep, emotional attachment, but there are some really interesting sections about how sympathetic development is eventually adopted (even if it’s initially boycotted). Blue Posts is the case in point here.

Anyway, a question that stuck with me is: why do we (I) want to hang on to every single bit of history — even the crap bits? Does a lick of paint change the molecular structure of a place? Why does cleaning the brass up or swapping out paintings of the hunt for prints by local artists bring about an achy sort of sadness?

For The Coach, things are different. It’s being bought by Fullers, not an enthusiastic beer historian keen to retain its noble features. But even if it was, would that still mark the end of an era? And why?

Someone joked with me at the pub I sometimes work at that because I’d cleaned the toilets earlier that day, it counted as a renovation. He said “Everything’s changing, don’t change this place.”

Bear in mind the pub I sometimes work at is no more than four years old.

Other things:

My things:

  • I promised a blog post this week but guess what, I haven’t had the chance, what with Carnivale Brettanomyces (which was EXCELLENT) and everything. Expect at least one in time for next week’s bulletin.

  • This restaurant review I wrote got a lot of “creative criticism”. Apparently. I don’t read the comments.

  • Charlie Papazian shared my piece on hops in the Orbigo Valley, which means he’s read it, nbd.

  • If you’re not already following me on Instagram, you can do so here. If you want.

  • Tom (my husband) has joined Twitter.

2: Unrealistic Deadlines


As a freelancer it’s easy to disregard every feeling that you might be working too hard because:

a) You’re doing a job other people tell you they’d much rather do,
b) You chose to live like this.

I’m taking a moment to complain. This week has been relentless and left me relatively unable to write creatively, thanks to a pod of submarines.

The Submarine Client: A client who doesn’t pay on time, asks for the moon in a tight pair of pants and disappears for months, but resurfaces during your busiest times with an offer too good to refuse.

I’d say no, but flattery and praise is on the cards.

WePresent by WeTransfer

If you’ve ever used WeTransfer, you’ll have noticed that the background of the site is usually papered with distracting photography, art and design. I bit this week and clicked the “read more” link, and realised I’d been missing out on a chunk of pristine alt culture writing and documentary #content for, potentially, years.

Here are my faves from an impromptu deep dive:


My Stuff

  • I’m heading to Amsterdam for Carnivale Brettanomyces today. I hate flying. Read this from Original Gravity on how airport beer gets me on the plane. (pp22–23)

  • I had a very drunken trip out on the East Lancs Steam Ale Rail Trail last weekend. My hot tips if you’re planning the same thing will be ready in time for next week’s newsletter.


Stuff I Liked This Week